No Lying

How about a little triva question to start? The following stories are true about which former president of the United States? A hint it’s not a recent one.
– When he was a young man who worked as a clerk at a general store, one evening after closing, counting the money in the drawer, he found he had accidentally took a few cents too much from a customer. So that night he walked three miles to return the customer’s money.
– On another occasion a woman came into the store and bought a half pound of tea. He later realized he had only a quarter pound weight on the scale, so he’d only given the woman a quarter pound of tea for the price of half a pound. So he closed down the store for a bit to personally deliver the remainder of the tea to the woman.
– Later in his life he made a living as a lawyer and had a reputation for unwavering honesty. In one case while defending a client, a key witness for his case took the stand, but the witness fabricated some of his testimony. Though the lie would have helped his case, he turned to the court and said, “Gentlemen, I depended on this witness to clear my client. He has lied. I ask that no attention be paid to his testimony. Let his words be stricken out, if my case fails. I do not wish to win in this way.”
Do you know who that man was?… Abraham Lincoln.

Deeds like that earned him the title “Honest Abe,” because in his day and all the more today that sort of honesty is…

A rare quality

There’s a book written in the early 1990s called “The Day America Told The Truth,” which records the results of the first mass survey of morality conducted in the United States. One of the conclusions of the authors after their survey and research was this:
“Americans lie. They lie more than we had ever thought possible before the study… 91% of us lie regularly. The majority of us find it hard to get through a week without lying. One in five can’t make it through a single day – and we’re talking about conscious, premeditated lies. In fact, the way some people talk about trying to do without lies, you would think that they were smokers trying to get through a day without a cigarette!”
They say 86% of those surveyed lied to their parents, 75% to their friends, 73% to their brothers and sisters, and 69% to their spouses. Lying has become a cultural trait in America.

An article on Forbes.com is entitled, I kid you not, “Lying is Good for You.” Here’s a paragraph from it about the prevalence of lying:
“We lie all the time. In 2002, Robert Feldman, a psychology professor at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, conducted a study in which he secretly videotaped students’ conversations with strangers. After the fact, he had the students examine the videotapes and identify the untruths. On average, they claim to have told three lies per ten minutes of conversation. And that number is likely far too low. .. we’re likely to under report the number of lies we tell (we lie about lying, that is)… In fact, we lie so readily that the dishonesty becomes automatic. Most of the time, we’re not even aware of the lies we tell, explains David Smith, director of the New England Institute at the University of New England and author of Why We Lie.”

Some lies in America have been used so often they’re joked about. I came upon a list of America’s greatest lies. Here are ten of them. I’m sure you’ve heard most of them, I’ve maybe said a few yourself.
The check is in the mail.
I’ll start my diet tomorrow.
We service what we sell.
One size fits all.
This hurts me more than it hurts you.
I just need five minutes of your time.
Your table will be ready in a few minutes.
Let’s get together and have lunch sometime.
It’s not the money; it’s the principle.
I’m from the federal government, and I’m here to help you.

We’re talking about honesty this morning because we’re on the ninth commandment in our study of the Ten Commandments, the code of ethics God declared from heaven to the nation of Israel. Exodus 20:16 is the ninth commandment, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.” Some think this just has reference to perjury, or lying under oath in a court of law. It certainly includes that. But it’s not limited to just lying in legal matters. We can also bear false witness outside the court room in our everyday conversation. I believe most lying is bearing false witness about someone or something and is to the detriment of our neighbors. So we’re going to talk about just dishonesty in general.

Why do we lie?

A little boy captured it well when his mother was working with him one day and asked, “Son what is a lie?” The little boy said, “Mommy, a lie is an abomination, but a very present help in a time of need.” Well, that’s it. That’s why we lie. Lying appears to us to be a present help in time of need.

In the Forbes’ magazine article “Lying is Good for You” it says,
“Simply put, we lie because it works. When we do it well, we get what we want. We lie to avoid awkwardness or punishment. We lie to maintain relationships and please others. And, of course, most of all we lie to please ourselves. Whether we’re embellishing our credentials or strengthening our stories, we often tell untruths to make ourselves appear and feel better.”

We lie to get what we want: money, business, a job, respect, love, friends, avoid embarrassment, avoid trouble, security, revenge perhaps, whatever it is.

So why not lie? Why make honesty your policy?

There’s the emotional ramifications of course – the guilt, shame, anxiety of being found out and the stress of keeping your lie covered. So you miss out on the life of peace God wants for us.

Then there’s the social ramifications.
Several years ago Sports Illustrated had this story:
“At a T-ball game in Wellington, Fla… first baseman Tanner Munsey, 7, fielded a ground ball and tried to tag a runner going from first base to second. The umpire, Laura Benson, called the runner out, but Tanner immediately approached her and said, “Ma’am, I didn’t tag the runner.” Benson awarded the runner second base and Tanner’s coach gave him the game ball for his honesty.
In a game two weeks later, with Benson again umpiring and Tanner playing shortstop, a similar play occurred. This time Benson thought Tanner had missed the tag on a runner going to third, and she called the runner safe. Tanner glanced at Benson and, without saying a word, flipped the ball to the catcher and returned to his position. Benson sensed something was wrong. “Did you tag the runner?” she asked Tanner.
“Yes,” he replied.
Benson then called the runner out. The opposing coaches protested until she explained what had happened two weeks earlier. Says Benson, “If a kid is that honest, I have to give it to him. T-ball is supposed to be for the kids.”
When you’re honest to own hurt, then you’re respected and trusted, and given privileges others aren’t given.

II Kings 12 describes how king Joash of Judah went about repairing the temple which was in dire need of repair in his day, how he placed a chest with a hole on top at entrance of the temple where people could drop in their offerings for the temple repairs. And when the chest was full the money was given to the construction supervisors, and II Kings 12:15 says this about it, “And they did not ask for an accounting from the men into whose hand they delivered the money to pay out to the workmen, for they dealt honestly.” The supervisors did have to be monitored or kept under surveillance or required to give itemized reports and receipts and hour logs and so forth. People weren’t suspicious of them, because they had reputations of honesty.

And related to the social ramifications, it is a promise of God repeated several times throughout the Scriptures that everything you try to cover up or hide, will be uncovered and exposed and made public. I can give a list of several Scriptures that promise that for anyone who wants it (Prov. 10:9; 26:24-26; Ecc. Luke 8:17; 12:2-3; I Tim. 5:24-25). Let me give you two examples.
In Luke 12:1-3 Jesus said, “Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy. 2 Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. 3 Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops.” So how’s your secret life, your private life? I hope it’s honorable, because it’s not going to stay secret. Our private life will eventually be publicized.
Ecclesiastes 10:20, “Even in your thoughts, do not curse the king, nor in your bedroom curse the rich, for a bird of the air will carry your voice, and some winded creature tell the matter.” Ecclesiastes is wise old Solomon’s observations about life in this world. Solomon observed that God is very at work in this world and in the details of our lives, and He works to bring our secret thoughts and words into the light.
So lying may work momentarily. But you will eventually be found out.

But more significant than the emotional and social ramifications are the spiritual and eternal ramifications.
Proverbs 12:22, “Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are His delight.” Could there be anything better than to be a delight to God, to be a person God thoroughly enjoys hanging out with and doing things with?
Jesus said in John 8:44 Satan is liar and the father of lies. Lying was his chosen method in the beginning to cause a separation between humanity and God and to bring corruption, suffering and death into the world. And lying has been his weapon of choice ever since. Those who agree with his ways and follow his ways will end up with him forever. Revelation 21:8 says, “all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.
And Jesus is the faithful and true witness, the light of the world. His policy is honesty always. To follow Jesus is to be honest. Those who follow Jesus will end up with Him forever. Revelation 14 is a vision of the redeemed standing on Mt. Zion with the Lamb. They have the name of the Lamb and His Father written on their foreheads, it says in Revelation 14:4-5, “It is these who follow the Lamb wherever He goes. These have been redeemed from mankind as firstfruits for God and the Lamb, and in their mouth no lie was found, for they are blameless.”
Will you be one of those with Him in the end? Blameless, with no lie found in your mouth?

What are some ways of lying that we might overlook?

Embellishing Our Stories
Nobody wants to tell dull boring stories. We all want our stories to be as exciting and entertaining and sensational or dramatic or funny as possible, so people enjoy us more and think more highly of us or to really strengthen whatever point we want to make. So we’re tempted to exaggerate or alter the details a bit, add a little more color to our stories. That’s why you can rarely believe somebody when they tell you how big of a fish they caught, or how bad terrible spouse is they’ve been fighting with and how uprightly and innocently they’ve been handling things. Embellishment is very common when people write resumes; people stretch the facts to get the job. And an area I’ve noticed I’ve really got to be careful to not embellish is when I share testimonies of things I believe God did. I’ve had to correct myself sometimes in sharing God testimonies. When you so want people to realize the presence and power and willingness of God to do great things in our midst, you can be tempted to exaggreate a little how evidently the person prayed for was touched by the Holy Spirit for instance, or how intense was the feeling of His presence, or whatever it may be. We have to be careful not to make something more sensational than it actually was or else we are in essence bearing false witness about what God did.

Another way of lying, which is an epidemic in most work spaces, schools, coffee houses, and churches…
Gossip and Rumor
Repeating juicy morsels of unsubstantiated information you heard about other people. Possibly some of it fact, but don’t know for sure how much of it is true. Most often, gossip and rumor contains some falsehood, because people tend to embellish and exaggerate things to make a better story.

Another way of lying we tend to overlook but God doesn’t is…
Flattery
Flattery has been cleverly defined as saying something to a person’s face that you would never say behind their back. It’s telling someone things they want to hear that you don’t really believe, because it’s for some reason to your advantage that they like you. So you tell your boss after the meeting, “Boy, that was one of the best presentations I think I have ever heard.” But later on the phone with your wife, she asks, “How was his presentation?” “O it was awful. He’s a terrible communicator. But he really liked it when I complimented him. I think I may get a raise.”
Or you tell the preacher, “Wonderful sermon you gave today!” Then in the car on the way home, “That was the most boring, useless thing I have ever heard.” (I know you never do that. That’s just in other churches.)

Psalm 12:1-3, “Save, O LORD, for the godly one is gone; for the faithful have vanished from among the children of man. 2 Everyone utters lies to his neighbor; with flattering lips and a double heart they speak. 3 May the Lord cut off all flattering lips, the tongue that makes great boasts.”

Another form of dishonesty to beware of…
Frivolous Little Promises
“I’ll pay you back as soon as I can.” Will you really? As soon as you can?

Or, “I’ll see if I can make it to that Bible study.” Or “I’ll see if I can make it Saturday to healp out with that project.” Will you really? You will try to rearrange your schedule to make it work?

Or when a brother or sister shares a concern with us, it common for us to say, “I’ll pray about that.” Or, “You’ll be in my prayers.” It’s an easy promise to make because it gives people a little comfort to hear and they won’t know if you do it or not. I’ve tried to develop a habit so that I don’t make that promise and then forget to do it; when I tell someone I’ll pray for you, then as soon as I’m done talking with that person before I go do anything else, I’ll pause and say a prayer for them. Then at least I’ve prayed for them once, and doing it once helps me to remember to do it again the next time I pray.

Another very common form of dishonesty is…
Excuse-making
When someone asks you, “Why didn’t you come join us Friday night?” Or “Did you get my message? Did you get my text? Why didn’t you respond?” Or, “Why didn’t you invite me to that get-together?” Or “Why didn’t you come help, or do this or that thing you should have done?” and when telling the truth will either make you look bad or likely hurt their feelings a bit, how do we answer? Do we make up excuses to avoid embarrassment or hurting feelings? “Oh I wasn’t feeling well that day.” Or, “No I never got your message. Weird. I don’t know what happened.” Or are we honest people who will just admit it when we’re in the wrong and apologize?

And then, did you know there are ways of lying without any false statement coming out of our mouth at all? To lie or bear false witness is just to intentionally mislead, and you can do that…
With your actions, with silence and with technically true statements.
A man in Bible college, overwhelmed with the work load at school and not ready for a major exam. He wants more time to study, but doesn’t want to lie. So on the morning of the exam, he goes to the kitchen freezer, grabs a frozen pack of fish, then goes to his bedroom, lays down on the bed and starts tossing the frozen fish up in the air, and has his wife get on the phone with the school secretary and say, “I’m really sorry, Joe won’t make it to class today; he’s in bed throwing up his supper.”… Technically true, but intentionally misleading, and God doesn’t play that game.

Or you’re on a joint selling mission with a fellow sales colleague. In the negotiation with the client your colleague tells the client some things you know are just a flat out lie. If you just sit there in silence because you don’t want to embarrass your co-worker and you want the client’s business, your silence is validating that what’s being said is accurate as far as you know. If that client sees you sometime later after finding out he was lied to, he’s not going to say, “Hey buddy, I’m so mad at that other salesmen, because he lied to me.” No. He’s going to point his finger in your face and say, “You lied to me! You knew I was being fed lies. You could have spoke up, but you just sat there.”

There was a famous story in the early church of lying without technically saying anything false. Luke wrote about it in his record of the early church called the book of Acts. During first few years of Christianity in Jerusalem, there were some believers who sold land and homes and then brought the proceeds of the sale and laid them at the apostles’ feet, to be distributed to those in need in the church. No doubt those who did that were held in high esteem for their generosity. So a couple named Ananias and Sapphira, sold a piece of property, and decided keep back back some of the price they got for it for themselves, and then Ananias came into the congregation and laid the rest of the money at the apostle’s feet to be distributed. The text doesn’t indicate that Ananias said anything at all. And the problem wasn’t that they kept some for themselves. They weren’t obligated to give away all the price they got for the land. But the problem was they didn’t telling anybody they kept back some for themselves, and they acted like they were doing the same thing the other generous believers had done. They intentionally gave everyone the impression that they were giving away all they’d made on the sale.
God chose to use that occasion to make very clear to His people how He feels about that kind of dishonesty in His church. The apostle Peter received a word of knowledge by the Spirit of God about what was happening. So Acts 5:3ff, Peter said, “Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and to keep back for yourself part of the proceeds of the land? 4 While it remained unsold, did it not remain your own? And after it was sold, was it not at your disposal? Why is it that you have contrived this deed in your heart? You have not lied to men but to God.” When Ananias heard these words, he fell down and breathed his last. And great fear came upon all who heard of it. 6 The young men rose and wrapped him up and carried him out and buried him.
7 After an interval of about three hours his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. 8 And Peter said to her, “Tell me whether you sold the land for so much.” And she said, “Yes, for so much.” [So she just blatantly lied about it.] 9 But Peter said to her, “How is it that you have agreed together to test the Spirit of the Lord? Behold, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.” 10 Immediately she fell down at his feet and breathed her last. When the young men came in they found her dead, and they carried her out and buried her beside her husband. 11 And great fear came upon the whole church and upon all who heard of these things.

I don’t know for sure whether or not they missed heaven, but they sure cut their life short and brought great shame on themselves. And God made very clear His abhorrence of dishonesty among those who know His grace and faithfulness, what He’s sacrificed for them and the presence of His Spirit.

We could talk about many other forms of lying or bearing false witness. Like telling half-truths like Abraham telling people that his wife Sarah was his sister. And there’s plagiarism. And there’s people being careless in the way handle and teach God’s word, that results in bearing false witness about God. And there’s hypocrisy, hiding your sin, pretending to be more righteous than you are.

The Spirit of the Lord is still ever present, listening and watching and searching hearts, knowing if we are in any way attempting to mislead or give people wrong impressions, or if we’re not being careful to make sure all we say is true.

As I close here, let me remind you of the promise in Proverbs 28:13, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.”

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